We begin the sad tale when Terry was young
When Enid Blyton proved lots of fun
But his vision didn't dim his adventurous nights
He read the Secret Seven under artificial lights

Oh dear what's with Terry
Oh dear its not right
The local girls are not so pretty
But they all look the same through Terry's sight

Then came the day Terry always did dread
Christmas had come a present lay on his bed
A Johnny 7 or a cuddly toy?
No harm them glasses fit for a boy

Oh dear what's ...
Wearing glasses never became the craze
So the years they passed in a hazy daze
Even at matches he'd shout and roar

Pretending he'd seen another George Best goal
Being Joe 90 has proved a success
But he's no Clark Gable never the less
They found the answer to this classic case

It wasn't the glasses its his horrible face
Oh dear what's

Writer : DAMIAN STEPHEN O'NEILL
Copyright : Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group